Axe: A Steel Paragons MC Novel Page 12

  Not that it could get any worse. But the way he was looking at me right then reminded me of the first time he’d actually turned his attention to me. There was a fire there and I knew it was burning hot for me. I didn’t want to lose that again.

  My tongue darted out to lick my bottom lip. I hadn’t even realized that I’d done it until his eyes jerked down to my lips at the movement. His hands moved to the side of my face and he traced the line of my jaw with his pointer finger. My body sagged into him and I couldn’t have even resisted if I’d tried.

  “Nothing you could tell me will make me want you less,” he said against my lips before he finally captured them with his.

  I hesitated only because I was taken off guard. Then I was pushing into him, kissing him like I’d never kissed anyone before. And well, that was because I hadn’t. This was my first real kiss.

  Holy Fuck!

  Was the timing a bit messed up? Yeah, sure. But if you really thought about it, we were both pretty screwed up. It should have been no surprise that this was the perfect moment for this.

  His lips were soft as they bounced off of mine. His tongue licked the seam of my mouth and I automatically let him in. When my lips parted, he didn’t hesitate to claim my mouth. His tongue slipped in, searching for mine. The kiss that had started out sweet and tender quickly turned into a heated, desperate need to get closer to one another.

  My legs wrapped around his waist, pulling him into my core. I felt his huge, thick bulge pressing against the confinement of his jeans. One of his hand slid into my hair, his fingers coiling in the strands. His other hand gripped my hip, trying to hold it in place. That was when I’d realized I’d been rocking against him trying to relieve the tingling between my legs. I couldn’t deny I was wet. Matter of fact, I was pretty sure I’d soaked through my panties and onto my sleep shorts. A whimper escaped my throat and he swallowed it down.

  His hand made its way around my back and up my shirt. I felt him grazed over my scars and I flinched. I knew he sensed it because he suddenly pulled back. I shook his hand off and he let me.

  To my disappointment, he took a step back and blew out a harsh breath as his hand brushed frantically back and forth through his hair.

  Way to ruin the moment.

  Before I could see further rejection in his eyes, I hopped down and put my hand on his chest as if I was pushing him away.

  “Talk to me,” he said and his tone was oddly soft. I didn’t know what to do with that.

  For the most part, he was flat. The more time he spent around me the more I had heard it waver from time to time. I wanted to know if that was normal for him or if it was only with me. The urge to ask bubbled up and it took all my strength to not open my mouth to do so.

  “I should go back to bed,” I stupidly said then I sidestepped him and all but ran up the stairs.

  CHAPTER SEVENTEEN

  Axe

  She scampered off like a little mouse and I stood there stunned into utter shock as her bare feet lightly rushed up the stairs.

  What the fuck just happened?

  And what the fuck was that on her back?

  I was smart enough to figure out that they were scars. I wanted to know how the hell she had gotten them. They were deep and raised. The more I stood there and thought about it, the more enraged I became.

  I needed to calm down because the last thing she needed was to think that I was mad at her. No, I was mad for her. For all the shit that she had to endure. I was way past pissed off and I had a strong urge to kill the man that had done that to her. But nothing about my rage was aimed towards her.

  The night had sure taken a turn in a direction I would have never thought of.

  The moment my lips were on hers, I knew I was done for. No other woman would ever compare. I never believed in that shit until that moment. Right then, I believed so much you could have put me on the podium of true love and I would have preached the shit out of it. I could admit that I’d never been more captivated or curious about a woman in my life. Somehow she had managed to not only take over my thoughts but also get under my skin. And I couldn’t stand there and deny that Neiryn hadn’t gotten to me, too.

  The reason that I had stopped and stepped back was because she stiffened, not because I wanted to. But I began to wonder if she knew that.

  Shit!

  I was just not very good at any of this. I needed to explain things to her, but I needed to calm down first.

  Feeling my hard as steel dick pushing against my pants, I let out a long sigh as I willed him to go back down. He wasn’t one to listen, though. I ran my hand through my hair as I planned my next move. I wasn’t going to stand there like a fuckwad in the kitchen all night. No, I wasn’t going to leave it like this.

  I killed the power on the coffeemaker and put the cups in the sink. I could take care of those in the morning, it wasn’t what mattered right now.

  I made my way upstairs and saw that all the lights had been turned off. The glow of the moon that streamed through the cracks in the blinds provided the only guiding light. With steady steps, I made my way to the side of the bed.

  Her back was to me and as I stepped closer she didn’t move. I kicked off my sneakers then slipped off my cut and shirt. Tossing them on the dresser behind me, I moved to the bed. Leaving my jeans on, I slid under the covers and scooted right behind her.

  Damn, I hadn’t thought about pillows. I was going to have to make a point to go get some, and soon.

  I wrapped my arm around her and slid the other under her head. I buried my face in the crook of her neck as I pulled her closer to me, holding her like I never wanted to let her go. She didn’t say anything and neither did I.

  After a while, her breaths became even and I could feel the weight of her head pressing into my arm. As soon as I knew she was relaxed and asleep, I let my tired eyes fall closed and I drifted off.

  The sunlight danced behind my closed lids. I had no idea what time it was but I knew I didn’t want to open my eyes and face the day. Her soft body was pressed tight against mine and I knew the moment I admitted to the world that I was awake, everything would change.

  Nothing mattered to me right then but enjoying this moment of her in my arms. I didn’t care that my hand was numb from being used as her pillow all night. Or that in the back of my mind I was freaking out about what had happened with Ethel and not knowing had set me even more on edge. Or the fact that there were things she still hadn’t told me. Or the giant neon sign that was screaming at me that once I did know whatever she was hiding, I would feel even worse.

  Instead of letting all those thoughts and worries cloud my mind, I simply pulled her closer to me and buried my face in her neck. Her sweet scent invaded my senses and made my body come alive. Every part of it. From my head, filled with all the images I had of her flashing slowly by. To my heart, which seemed to beat faster with a warmer pulse. To my…well, my damn dick, which was hard as fucking granite right now. Being this close to her, completely immersed in almost every part of her, made every inch of me come alive. It was something I’d never experienced before and I was sure I never wanted to know what it was like to live without it.

  Before I was completely ready to, I opened my eyes. A smile spread across my face and because I couldn’t help myself, I pressed my lips to the back of her neck. Allison stirred in her sleep, her butt wiggled back as if she was trying to get closer to me. I held back a groan as her ass brushed over my hard cock.

  I lifted my head to look over at Neiryn in his kid jail.

  Damn, I really wish I could have finished that bed for him last night.

  As I watched him wriggle around like he was doing his best to pull himself out of his slumber, I knew it wouldn’t be long now before he fully woke. There was no sense in even trying to go back to sleep. I’d have to get up and face the day and all the problems that came with it.

  The early morning light was dimmed by the closed blinds, casting a soft glow on her creamy skin.

 
My eyes roamed over her body. The sheet had been pushed away, revealing the sexy curve of her hip. I followed the lines along the side of her body desperate to take in everything about her and burn it into my memory. I moved my gaze up over her arm.

  As I followed the curve of her shoulder and over her shoulder blade, my eyes caught on something under her shirt. I leaned back as my eyes squinted to make out what it was. I could detect black lines through her thin white shirt but my mind struggled to put the lines together to form an image, it was too blurred by the fabric that covered it.

  Without giving it a second thought, my fingers gripped the hem of her shirt and I pulled it up, exposing her lower back. With a feeling of dread in my gut, I pushed it up further. The thick black lines of a tattoo showed themselves, the image slowly revealed itself the more I exposed her.

  Two black and gray roses came into view and my mind did its best to replace the image with something else. Only, I couldn’t. I couldn’t deny that I already knew the rest of what I was about to see. And sure enough, as I jerked the thin fabric all the way up, I was met with a sight that made my blood boil with hate and rage.

  My hand shook as I took in the whole thing. Sure enough, there was no denying what I saw. But what it meant I didn’t even want to think about.

  I blinked, praying that I wasn’t seeing what was really in front of me, only it did nothing but burn the image into my mind.

  A skull sat in between her shoulder blades. Wrapped around the skull, almost as if it was holding it up as a prized possession, were two skeleton hands. There was what I could only presume was meant to be a bullet hole in the middle of the skull. The middle finger of one of the hands was wrapped around the front and the tip disappeared into the hole.

  “Fuck!” I growled—yes, actually growled—as I jumped out of the bed like it was suddenly filled with spiders. “God motherfuckin’ dammit!” Shit.”

  I pulled at my hair as I paced the space beside the bed. My head jerked to the side and I was met with the image again. For some reason, my brain was hoping that it would be different this time. But it wasn’t. Even though her shirt had slid part of the way back down, I could still tell it was the same.

  There was no mistaking it, she was one of The Devil’s Kings’ girls. She, in a sense, belonged to Savage.

  She started to rouse, and as soon as she realized that her shirt was moved she knifed up in the bed. Her eyes met mine and her face was a mix of shock and anger. There was no doubt that I’d seen what she had been trying to hide. Her mouth opened, but nothing came out.

  Was she a spy? Was everything she had told me a lie? Had I fallen for all that shit? Fuck, I was the dumbest jackass ever. Hell, if she was there to find my weakness, she sure as shit did her job.

  My head was spinning and I felt like I was about to lose control. Had I really been that stupid? Was I blinded by her beauty so much that I’d missed the signs?

  My anger took over and I jumped onto the bed. My body pinned her to the bed, my legs on either side of her hips. Without even thinking, my hand wrapped around her neck while the other pushed on her chest as I held her down. She didn’t try to fight me. In fact, she looked almost as if she had resigned. Her fate was in my hands and she didn’t even try to buck me off.

  I hated it. I wanted her fight and it almost hurt my soul like a sharp knife to the chest. Only, this time it wasn’t because of some weird, twisted, fucked up sexual thing in my brain. This time it was because I wanted her to fight for herself and her son. I needed to see that strength even if I wanted to tear her to shreds at the moment. Fuck! It was all messed up.

  Her eyes were wide as she looked up at me, regret and fear swirled around in those deep blue orbs.

  Not wanting Neiryn to wake to this sight, I pulled myself away as I gripped her arm and yanked her off the bed and out of the room. Her feet stumbled along as I marched down the hall and descended the stairs. Part of me was worried that I was hurting her, yet, part of me didn’t care.

  Once we hit the landing, I pushed her up against the closest wall. Her body hit with a thud and her eyes looked on the verge of tears.

  “Tell me what the fuck is going on. Now!” I roared, the anger in my tone sounding foreign to my ears.

  Her eyes widened and a few tears escaped. If she thought that shit was going to work on me, she had another thing coming.

  What the hell am I doing?

  I released her and took a step back, my eyes never leaving hers. Panic washed over me as I thought about my father. My teeth ground together at the thought that I was just like him.

  For what seemed like an eternity we stood there in silence, her body pressed against the wall as if I was still holding her there. She didn’t speak or even open her mouth in an attempt to.

  “Pack his bag. Now!” I barked.

  I didn’t even stick around to see if she was doing what I had demanded. I made my way up the stairs, taking them two at a time with hurried steps.

  “Hey there, Lil man,” I managed to say in a softer tone as soon as I walked into the room and saw that he was awake.

  He was standing up in his pen, his little hands gripped the edge tightly. I made my way over to him, all the while, trying to calm my racing heart and shaking hands. As I got closer, I could see he was holding onto his blanket with one hand. The moment he saw me a huge smile spread across his face.

  “Moorin,” he mumbled like he was still half-asleep as he reached his arms in the air like he wanted me to pick him up. “Up.”

  “Good mornin’, buddy,” I said as I moved to the dresser and grabbed my abandoned cut and shirt that were there. After tossing them on with lightning speed, I shoved my feet into yesterdays socks trying my hardest not to cringe, then put on my sneakers.

  I picked him up and held him tightly against my body, hoping like hell he couldn’t sense the aggravation that was pouring off of me in waves. This wasn’t his fault. He was an innocent in it all.

  I wouldn’t lie, part of me came up here to comfort and check on him, but the other part of me knew that she wouldn’t run from me if I had him. Whatever the hell was going on, if she was a traitor or whatnot, I could tell that she loved Neiryn.

  I dug through the clothes that Ellie had ordered for him. I pulled out a pair of dark jeans and a shirt that had a motorcycle on it. I almost chuckled thinking about how Ellie had been so doe-eyed and unknowing when she’d first walked into the club and now she was completely submerged in the life.

  Placing him on the bed, I made quick work of getting him dressed all the while rambling on with some story about his stuffed lion and elephant saving the princess. I honestly had no idea what I was saying, but he was sure loving the shit out of it. I had changed his diaper a few times over the past week and at this point, I felt like a damn pro.

  “You are one badass lookin’ dude,” I said as I picked him up. He replied with a giggle as he pointed to the motorcycle on his shirt, then to the patch on my cut. A smile spread across my face and for some fucking reason, I felt pride spreading through my heart. Why? Well, I couldn’t even begin to answer that.

  I leaned over the pen and grabbed his blanket and his lion. Then I headed back down the stairs, my slightly elevated mood wiped clean the moment I laid eyes on Allison.

  She was standing there, a nervous energy coming off of her as she wrapped her hand around the strap of the diaper bag that was hanging off of her shoulder. In her free, hand I saw she was clinging to a sippy cup full of milk and a container of oatmeal for Neiryn.

  I hardly gave her a second glance as I walked out the back door and to the attached garage where I knew her car was.

  “Keys,” I said and she placed them in my palm. “Get in.”

  With a tiny nod, she scooted around to the passenger’s side as I moved to put Neiryn in his car seat in the back. I somehow managed to get him buckled in that kid contraption seat without too much trouble, even though it was my first time. I checked to make sure it was all buckled tightly before I stood tall an
d shut the door.

  I leaned against the driver’s side door, the coolness of the metal against my back did nothing to douse the angry fire I had inside. I blew out a harsh breath as I reached into my pocket for my pack of smokes. This entire past week I’d had the amount that I would have before noon on a regular day. Tank would have been so proud.

  I was in a ‘fuck it all’ mood. If I didn’t take this moment to try my best to calm down there was no telling what I would do. The last thing any of us needed was for me to snap. I lit the cigarette and took a deep drag. I needed to call Cal and find out where he was. Fuck. First I needed a phone and the new number to reach the prez.

  Man, shit was all fucked up. Whatever was going on with Bocca and his shit was messing us all up.

  Taking one last inhale, I dropped the cigarette to the ground and smashed it under my sneaker. As I slid into the driver’s seat and started the car, the only thing I could do was think about how bad this was all about to get. I had a feeling once Cal and the rest of the club found out, I wouldn’t be able to protect her anymore and the fucked up thing was that I still wanted to.

  Rolling out of the driveway, I saw the prospect leaning up against his bike across the street. I waved him over as I put the window down and he came jogging over without hesitation.

  “You got a new phone?” I asked him. He gave a short nod as he dug into his pocket and produced a burner phone. “Cal’s number in there?”

  Without a word, he brought up the number and handed me the phone. Cal picked up on the second ring.

  “Yeah?” he grunted.

  “I’m coming in. Need to talk right now,” I said as calmly as possible.

  “There a problem?”

  “Yeah,” I answered him shortly.

  “Fuck. I don’t need more shit right now. Fine, I’m at the clubhouse. I’ll be in my office waitin’.” I could hear the stress thick in his voice.

  “Seven minutes,” I said, letting him know that I was coming right now and then dropped the call.